I had a talk the other day about my weight and my image. I've heard this talk so many times in my life. No matter what weight I'm at, there is always a good male friend of mine who let's me know it is just simply not enough. They mean well, and truly believe they are doing me a favor by saying so. It always makes me wonder though how I seem to have always attracted this to me when I could not imagine saying things like that to anyone else.
I heard recently from a very well meaning friend that maybe the work I'm doing won't really show up in full because I don't fit the image people are looking for unless I drop weight. I get what he's saying, and there is some serious truth to that. I have put on some very serious happy weight along with certain medications that I've been on that cause an increase in weight gain. Sometimes, that weight gain is worth it when the meds actually work. I'd take me happy with some extra baggage any day to me being miserable and scared but looking better.
Especially since, even when I was 'looking better' I still had those well meaning male friends telling me I'd be hot if I dropped 20. No matter what my weight has been in my life, someone is always there to make sure I know it is not enough.
It became my mission several years ago to fall in love with myself-for who I am. And, to turn around and share that same view with others. I'm not an obese person, mind you. I could certainly be smaller...but even when I do, I can promise those people will still always show up.
So I begin to think about what it is that I truly want: I want to feel good about myself. I want to exercise more, and eat better. I don't want to EVER measure value through numbers-size, or numbers. The other thing I don't want is those well meaning people to feel that it is ok to let me know that I don't look good to them. What matters is that I get into the space where I look good to me.
So, maybe I won't get very much further than I've already gotten with my books and my platform-but I do know that I didn't write all of those things from the depths of my being to have it all come down to what's on the outside.
I don't work that way. I hope you don't either.
My thought for the day: start looking from the heart. I know plenty of skinny, pretty people who are down right ugly when it gets past the skin.
To be a swan encompasses it all...but most of all from within.
Keep on pushing forward, and follow your dreams...and don't let ANYBODY tell you different.
"No one can make you feel inferior without your consent." ~Eleanor Roosevelt
No comments:
Post a Comment